New Tats, I Got Muh hair Did, & It Was Our 1 Yr Anniversary

so this weekend we went to beaufort and savannah.
we stayed with dianna,
who was so gracious to invite us into her home for the weekend.
her house sits right on the marsh,
it is a view to die for.
and her lil teeny tiny Pom, Gram, is just deliciously adorable.
before we left for savannah,
dianna was kind enough to butch me up.
that is right, femmes and butches,
my curly long locks are GONE!!
i now have wonderful spikey hair.
in savannah, i got my tattoos.
i cried, i'm woman enough to admit it.
when the guy put the needle
on my backbone,
i wanted to rip his balls off and ram them down his throat.
my Bella held my hand,
like the wonderful wifey she is.
I know the pictures of my hair aren't that great,
and you can't see all of my hair.
(Not that there's much to see.)
But my Wifey was at work tonight,
so I had to do the best I could to take the pictures myself.
I'll get her to take better pictures tomorrow
and I'll post them then.
By the way, the purple star tattoo represents my Neverland,
watching and guiding over me.
The Chinese symbol means Strength.
I chose that particular symbol
because Reba sings a song titled "Survivor."
In it she sings
"...The doctor gave me 30 days,
But I must have had my mama's will,
And God's amazing grace...
The baby girl without a chance,
A victim of circumstance,
The one who oughta give up,
But she's just too hard headed...
With gentle hands,
And the heart of a fighter,
I'm a survivor..."
Anyways, that songs relates a lot to me, I feel.
I feel that because I am a survivor, I have strength.
Anyways, I'm through rambling.
Hope yall enjoyed the pictures.

A Little Lesson To Live By: It is not by the amount that giving is productive of reward but rather by the generous impulse behind it. Therefore even so little as a handful of rice flour given with a pure heart becomes something that will bring great reward.-Vimana Vatthu

Happy Anniversary (3-29-06)

this past year with you, my Bella, has trully been amazing. you awoke me from a slumber, in which i thought i was forever cursed. loves lost, scorned, resented...all that changed with one kiss from your precious lips. this is our year. happy anniversary, my Bella. now it is time to make our biggest plans yet; our own family. i want you to know, that i love you more than i have ever loved anybody in my entire life. you are, without a doubt, my soulmate. it was written in the stars, that you and i would be together. thank you for being wonderful you, thank you for loving me, and thank you for letting me love you. **MUAH**

New Pics...

Well we got new haircuts today...
I said "SO LONG CHARLIE!!" (Sorry, Rosie quote, there.) My hair's still auburn, but I got HOLY SHIT Blonde bangs. My family HATES it, but I LOVE IT. My Bella, put a bit of Blonde in her hair and it looks SUPER. She got hers cut, she dunno it yet, But I'mma spike the HELL outta it!! We went to Alex's BB Game today in Florence. He lost by 4 points I think. But BOY was he EVER PISSED!! Anyways, I'm outta here, I got a HOTT woman waitin on me in bed!! *WooT*

My Bella-

My Bella,

As a little girl, I dreamt of fairytales constantly. I envisioned myself being loved by the most courageous soul that ever graced this Earth. Back then, it was definitely a paint-by-numbers fantasy I was blindly wishing for.
I can recall being on one of our numerous Girl Scout camping trips at Sandy Ridge, lying in my sleeping bag around the fire that had all but faded out, looking up at the night sky. Gazing at the heavens above, it was easy to immerse myself in the storybook tale that would one day be my reality. With every shooting star, I would close my eyes and make a wish. I wished to meet my soul mate, fall in love at first sight, ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after.
Looking back, using the wisdom learned, I see a pure soul wishing for true love and acceptance. My Mother used to tell me all the time, “look both ways before you cross the street,” or “don’t do drugs,” or even “don’t cuss, its not lady like.” Never did she forewarn me of the road of heartbreak I would have to endure to meet that person, my soul mate. No one said it would be this hard.
Along the way, I found certain ones who I could’ve sworn to be my companion. A childhood love gone awry, innocence naively surrendered to a soul mate imitator, one whose heart I tossed behind me like an empty candy wrapper, another soul gone astray in her self-made prison of her miasma of lunacy, and the unattainable ones smothered with various thrills.
Rejection of miscellaneous sorts hardened the untainted soul to a stone cold statue. I had become so enraged with spite that no one dared to try and climb the wall around my heart. My facade was a bad ass who couldn’t be hurt anymore. If only they knew every time a door closed, I became that little girl I once was, and stared at the stars above, crying burning silent tears. I prayed that soon a valiant soul would soon see the scorched marks of my shameful tears, swoop in, and rescue me.
I had all but given up on the reverie of love. I decided it was time to heal myself, inside out. This meant, I must confront the monster I saw staring at me in the mirror. Every hurt, regret, tear, ill-spoken thought or word all had to be mended, and then set free. It was time to let go of that baggage that merely weighed me down. I had to figure out who I was. I knew who and what the facade was, that everyone else saw. It was as if I had embodied some nameless costume and was damned to live in that, never allowing the world to see my true self, my soul.
Once I had let the wounds begin to heal, the weight somehow mysteriously vanished. Amazingly the frown transformed to a smile. The beacon of light, belonging to my soul, gleamed out through my eyes. Just as people must believe in fairies for the fairies to survive and flourish, I had to believe in myself for me to resurrect and truly live again.
Then that magical day came when I looked into your eyes and at once, the final missing piece of the puzzle within me, was found. I’d found my other half. My circle was completed, everything began to make sense. Your kisses enchant the stars above, while your touch soothes the Olympians.
The reflection of the rest of my life glows when I peer into your beautiful eyes. Like the stars residing in the Heavens, like the beds that rest the angels, and the lullabies the sing the babies to sleep, your soul sparkles and dares to be kissed with love.
Everyday of this past year with you, I knew I was alive. I was where I was meant to be. That in itself is a rare feeling. Knowing, without a shadow of a doubt, that you are indeed exactly where you belong. It is the feeling that out of everywhere on the face of this Earth, and beyond the borders of space, out of all time, past and present, out of people to see and be with long-ago and currently, I am exactly where destiny and fate want me to be. That is the way I feel, to this day, every time you hug me, or wrap your arms around me when we go to sleep at night.
Thank you, mon femme Bella. You have completed my life, my soul, my family…you are my soul mate. Never again will I taste another’s lips or know their ecstasy; yours is the one I crave for all time. The mere thought of not being with you breaks my heart, a mere thought.
As an adult, I no longer dream of fairytales. I’m being loved by the most courageous soul that ever graced this Earth. The love I blindly wished for, no longer a paint-by-numbers fantasy, but my reality. Walking out of the door of our cozy country home, I look up at the night sky. Gazing at the heavens above, it was easy to immerse myself in the storybook tale that is my reality. With every shooting star, I close my eyes and thank destiny and fate. I found my soul mate, fell in love at first sight, rode off into the sunset and am living happily ever after.
I love you, Bella.

Love Me Always,
Sarah

Bouncin Back...

well lets see...
its been a ROUGH week.
my Dr RX'ed me Flexoril to help ease off my pulled muscles.
well...
10 mg, 3X's a day...
NOT a good combo i found out.
heinous, evil nightmares
and even more wicked hallucinations
capped without the ability to differintiate between asleep & awake.
thank GODDESS for my Bella!!
she was right there by my side,
along with the spiders and Harley's missing ear.
i am all better now though...
bella said she is glad i'm back.
isn't that sweet?!
friday (yesterday) my family (cheryl, harley, & myself)
loaded up the car and headed to flotown.
her anniversary present arrived at my grandma's.
well, part of it anyways.
it a M*A*S*H hat,
thats her fav TV show.
we visited with my grandma for a while,
then went to my Momma's.
i love my boys.
they are so awesome!!
i'm still their favorite sissy!!
i called up wisabus to extend an invite to the Schoolhouse for supper.
i also invited my own Momma.
it felt wierd ridin in the van
with my Mom,
my Wife,
and my best friend.
i couldn't have been more happy and content.
on the way,
my mom just chatted up quite the storm with Bella.
wisabus and i just talked, occaisionally intruding their convo.
we saw 2 people there that we knew.
alex has a home baseball game on tuesday that we're goin to.
next week is going to be a busy busy week.
haircuts, OT therapy, errands, Florence....
then we drop off Harley next door, i guess,
(we've still yet to figure out where to stash him)
then off to BEAUFORT for our anniversary!!
*WooT*
this damn heart monitor is getting on my last nerve.
a whole month,
jo
oh fucking joy.

anyways,...
all is well here.

my food for thought: when you achieve that moment when you want for nothing,
all those you love are surrounding you, that, mes ami, is what brightens my soul.

St. Patty's Day Wisdom

TiNK SAY: * iTS Not Luck, iTS Karma *

*** (St.) Patrick apparently used a lot of symbolism. They say he used the shamrock to demonstrate the concept of Trinity. -Patrick never used the shamrock. ***

In Buddhist teaching, the law of karma, says only this: `for every event that occurs, there will follow another event whose existence was caused by the first, and this second event will be pleasant or unpleasant according as its cause was skillful or unskillful.' A skillful event is one that is not accompanied by craving, resistance or delusions; an unskillful event is one that is accompanied by any one of those things. (Events are not skillful in themselves, but are so called only in virtue of the mental events that occur with them.) Therefore, the law of Karma teaches that responsibility for unskillful actions is born by the person who commits them.

The Buddha's Words on Kindness (Metta Sutta)

This is what should be done
By one who is skilled in goodness,
And who knows the path of peace:
Let them be able and upright,
Straightforward and gentle in speech.
Humble and not conceited,
Contented and easily satisfied.
Unburdened with duties and frugal in their ways.
Peaceful and calm,
and wise and skillful,
Not proud and demanding in nature.
Let them not do the slightest thing
That the wise would later reprove.
Wishing: In gladness and in saftey,
May all beings be at ease.
Whatever living beings there may be;
Whether they are weak or strong,
omitting none,
The great or the mighty,
medium, short or small,
The seen and the unseen,
Those living near and far away,
Those born and to-be-born,
May all beings be at ease!
Let none deceive another,
Or despise any being in any state.
Let none through anger or ill-will
Wish harm upon another.
Even as a mother protects with her life
Her child,
her only child,
So with a boundless heart
Should one cherish all living beings:
Radiating kindness over the entire world
Spreading upwards to the skies,
And downwards to the depths;
Outwards and unbounded,
Freed from hatred and ill-will.
Whether standing or walking,
seated or lying down
Free from drowsiness,
One should sustain this recollection.
This is said to be the sublime abiding.
By not holding to fixed views,
The pure-hearted one,
having clarity of vision,
Being freed from all sense desires,
Is not born again into this world.

Ouchies.

so tonight my bell and i decided on our vacation spot.
in the low country of SC!!
we are going for the weekend of our 1 year anniversary.
* WooT *

occupational therapy is a bitch.
my muscles are tighter than ever,
* naughty thought *
ouchies. its still SORE.

trip to chucktown tomorrow.
rosie magazine of my own.
i feel like a lil kid
about to look at its first porno mag.
ahhh...

aunt flow visited.
dreams more colorful & vivid than ever.

peace out, stank asses.

Frozen In Time

The Tet Kid Survives MOTHER OF ALL Anxiety Attacks!!

so i went to the new Cardiologist today
the entire time spent there was one HUGE mutha fukkin anxiety attack
the office staff knew we were a couple
the doc says thatit is normal for tetrology of fallow patientsto suffer from irregular heartbeat,
shortness of breath,
and sleep apnea.
the right side of the heart takes on more pressure.

so i have to schedule an echo gram for next week.
he has to try to pinpoint the reasoning behind my irregular heartbeat.
he merely wants to rule out anything ' bad '

jesus.

like an irregular heartbeat isnt ' bad '.
you want to talk about scary?!

the nurses kept poking and prodding and apologizing. . .
it made me more irritable.
i pondered this thought,
why did this precise thing make me more irritable?

it reminded me of being at shriners hospital as a kid.
the doctors and students there
all poking and prodding ever so feverishly.
unless you have been through this experience...being BORN with a PHYSICAL DISABILITY
and having to sustain this torture
as you watch your parents sit there
frozen
mortified
silent tears falling from their cheeks...
them not knowing that they have the power
to tell the people poking and prodding
that you have a name.
you are a child,
not a painting or statue
eagerly posing for prying eyes.
if you havent been through that,
then you havent the faintest clue
as to the fear i felt today
that coursed through my veins.
it was like an ice tavern;
cold and empty.

i've survived another round in the game of life.
i felt like that child all over again;
i felt terrified.
the difference this time
was that my bella was there.
i wasn't alone.


I'm A Survivor Lyrics

I was born 3 months too early
The doctor gave me 30 days
But I must have had my mama's will
And God's amazing grace
I guess I'll keep on livin
Even if this love's to die for
Cuz your bags are packed
And I ain't cryin
Your walkin out and I'm not tryin
To change your mind
Cuz I was born to be

The baby girl without a chance
A victim of circumstance
The one who oughta give up
But she's just too hard headed
A single mom
Who works 2 jobs
Who loves her kids and never stops
With gentle hands
And the heart of a fighter
I'm a survivor

I don't believe in self pity
It only brings you down
May be the queen of broken hearts
But I don't hide behind the crown
When the deck is stacked against me
I just play a different game
My roots are planted in the past
And though my life is changing fast
Who I am is who I wanna be

The baby girl without a chance
A victim of circumstance
The one who oughta give up
But she's just too hard headed
A single mom
Who works 2 jobs
Who loves her kids and never stops
With gentle hands
And the heart of a fighter
I'm a survivor

Oh a single mom
Who works 2 jobs
Who loves her kids and never stops
With gentle hands
And the heart of a fighter
I'm a survivor

But I must have had my mama's will
And God's amazing grace
I'm a survivor

All Smiles...

today was great!!
i made a girl scout bird feeder
which honestly aint nothin but pnut buttah, a pinecone, and bird seed,
but it was loads of fun and rather nostalgic to make.
i raked the yard afterwards.
our yard looks so nice!!
its SO AWESOME to be able to rake your OWN YARD!!
it gives you a sense of PRIDE, doesnt it?
i cherish it,
garsh,
i got teary eyed over the brad paisely vid earlier,
now im gettin all fuzzy wuzzied over taking pride in our humble abode.
our cozy country cottage is SO adorable!!
im unbelievably lucky to have everything i do.
i thank the goddesses and gods on mt olympus every night.
tonight its me and my dog
bella is at work.
we will have fun,
no frets.
AC on,
a buncha stuff projects to be completed,
GREAT music blaring,
it will be nice.
tomorrow is the appt with my new cardiologist.
i am nervous
scared
even
but. . .
hey what can ya do?
e ' erbody is dealt a different stack of cards
in this game of life.
im mindin my hand in this round. . .
hopefully i can trash 3 cards to pull a royal flush?
i will be okay either way.
i have my guardian angel on my side.

Who Says You Can't Go Home
( Bon Jovi and Sugarland )

Ive spent 20 years tryin to get out of this place
I was lookin for somethin i couldn't replace
I was runin away from the only thing I've ever known
Like a blind dog without a bone
I was a gypsy lost in the twilight zone
I hijacked a rainbow and crashed into a pot of gold

Ive been there done that and I aint lookin back on the seeds Ive sown.
saving dimes, spending too much time on the telephone....
who says you cant go home
who says you cant go home

theres only one place they call you one of their own
Just a hometown boy born a rolling stone
who says you cant go home
who says you cant go back

been all around the world and as a matter of fact
theres only one place left i wanna go
who says you cant go home

its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright
i went as far as i could tryin to find a new face
There isnt one of these lines that i would erase
i left a million miles of memories on that road
every step i take i know that im not alone
You can take the home from the boy but not the boy from his home
these are my streets the only life ive ever known
Who says you can't go home
who says you cant go home
theres only one place they call you one of their own
just a hometown boy born a rolling stone
who says you can't go home
who says you cant go back

been all around the world and as a matter of fact
theres only one place left i wanna go
who says you cant go home

Dosent matter where you are
Dosent matter where you go
If its a million miles away or just a mile up the road
take it in, take it with you when you go
who says you can't go home
who says you can't go back
been all around the world
and as a matter of fact
theres only one place left i wanna go
who says you cant go home

its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright
who says you cant go home

its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright
who says you cant go home

its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright, its alright
Who says you cant go home!

Psychology

well this past Friday
Bella and i went home to Flotown.
we went to see the * bad side * of my familial unit
my grandmother,
the usual foul mothing culprit
willingly gave me a compliment.
part of Hell IS freezing, i see.
we then went to my Mommas house.
chloe has cushings disease.
steve is falling from his pedistal with his ailing back.
mom, margaret, her friend jesse, my mawmaw,
auntie boo, auntie gaye, lynn,
plus me and cheryl all went to redbone alley in celebration of the dual birthday,
belonging to margaret and mawmaw.
it was a VERY INTERESTING,
hilarious evening.
i have never been SO happily satisfied,
that was THE BEST time i have EVER had with my family.
margaret and i even mingled well.
the following day was quite horrid.
volumous arguing ensued.
no grey yet.
i only see the black and white.
time heals all.
MEANWHILE, the next day
Bella and i head to columbia.
we went to petsmarts for mo nutro
and i saw muh dog yall.
he was SUCH A BEAUTIFUL yorkie,
omg!!
the chickadee said that had he been one tenth of a pound lighter,
he would have been twenty five hundred.
but he did not look to be a teacup.
i know a teacup,
that was no teacup.
as adorable as the pup was,
only but a average toy he was.
we trotted over to barnes and nobles
where we spent much of the afternoon
drinking coffee drinks,
reading lesbian magazines ( NOT pornos!! )
engaging in conversation,
thumbing through the gay and lesbian section of the store.
i found an AWESOME book on the clearance rack
yes i am cheap, ya point
anyways its a criminal profiling book
VERY VERY AWESOME
today bella and i went to chucktown for my last visit with docta s
while were in c town,
we grabbed some oysters
stone crab claws
and snow crab legs
GOOD EATIN TONIGHT!!
my harley has me worried
since the arrival of pug next door
harley gorges on the dog food when he is there
and throws up when he gets home.
he is also eating his rawhides in a manner of like 2 days
and throwing them back up.
we took those away from him.
i figure it is instinct,
because since pugs arrived,
there are 3 dogs over there who * compete * for food,
space
and attention.
harleys instinct to survive kicks in over there
thus the reason he eats all the food he can get to while hes there.
he never did this before at lindas or my house.
then again he was being hand fed too there.
he is no longer hand fed and knows there are rules.
when harley visits next door,
pug laches on ( literally )
and does not let go of harley until goodbye.
dog psychology.
criminal psychology.
familial psychology.

LoL

The sign of a weak person is when you can piss them off. It means they have given you the power to affect thier state of mind. A strong lady would never allow anyone to have that power over her. The strong womans beliefs are even stronger, the faith, love, respect, and trust manifests her beliefs into reality. Prime examples? ANY religion. Disney World. Being IN LOVE. RELATIONSHIPS. A woman who fails to believe in the dream of a fairytale is a woman who has no faith in herself, no respect for herself, no love for herself, and no trust in her validity. Hate and jealousy are merely signs of weaknesses within a woman. If a woman FREELY CHOOSES to wear her Rose Colored glasses, then so be it. It just means she is a strong woman who believes in herself.

B- Beauty
I- In
T- Total
C- Control of
H- Herself

* Old Resentments Are now let go of. They are VANISHED. DO THE SAME. *

SCRUMPTIOUS!!

My Give A Damns Busted

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Me & Harley

Yea I was havin a good hair day today...and yea thas our Harley. Anybody that knows me, KNOWS I LAUGHED MY A$$ OFF at this!! Don't worry, yall animal lovers, I didn't hurt the lil fella. It didn't poison him, he's still alive & kickin. BTW, ya can't see it, but I also painted his toenails Neon Green. He looks like Yoda now, more than ever...although I should PROLLY change his name to Stewie (Griffin) from the FAMILY GUY, because he's probably plotting on how to kill me or torture me, LMFAO!!

The Littlest Girl Scout

The Littlest Girl Scout
By Erica Orloff

I admit it. I'm not cut out to be a soccer mom. I'm not class mom material, either. I don't bake homemade chocolate chip cookies. I don't even boil water. In fact, when my daughter, Alexa, was in kindergarten, as part of a "Why I Love My Mommy" Mother's Day project, her teacher asked her to name her "favorite dish" that Mom cooks. "I don't have one," she said. "Oh sweetheart, there must be something your mother cooks that you love. A special dinner? Your favorite dessert?" "My mommy doesn't cook." "She must make something," her increasingly desperate teacher insisted. "Jell-O?" After lengthy consideration, my daughter listed "cereal." So it was with much trepidation that I recently learned Alexa wanted to be a Brownie. I am a mom who is great at making up stories, singing off-key songs at bedtime and remembering the names of every Pokemon. But with three kids, a dog, a rabbit, a parrot and a veritable aviary of finches, life in our household is disorganized at best. Dinner is a haphazard affair, clothes always need ironing and shirts missing buttons are given safety pins in their stead. I flunked home economics in high school. Clearly, I did not have the makings of a Brownie-badge-earning mom. "Are you sure?" I asked, trying to mask my dread. Her delighted "yes" sealed my fate. I made it through the camping trip, even through crafts - though our potholders were decidedly ragged-looking. Then came the year's highlight: the cookie sale. Mentally, I counted my immediate family. I figured they were good for about ten boxes. I'd buy a few as well. That brought Alexa to a total of fifteen boxes or so - not too shabby. Her dad picked her up after the cookie sale meeting. Horrified, I watched as they struggled through the door with six CASES of cookies. Cases! After coming to, I managed to sputter, "What's all this?" "Her cookies," my husband answered. "Each girl is assigned six cases to sell." "But what if we can't sell all these?" "We bring them back," he said. "No big deal." "Oh no, Mommy!" Alexa cried out. "We have to sell them all. We just have to! The troop will make fun of me if I don't. One of the other Brownies told me that last year, not one girl brought back any cookies." Apparently, we were going to be hitting up Grandma for a lot more than the four boxes I had mentally sold to her. After ten days of ferocious selling, we had managed to sell a case and a half. Cookies were stacked in my home office from floor to ceiling - or at least that's how I remember it. I dreamed at night of Thin Mints chasing me down dark alleys. After four more days of selling, we still had four cases of cookies. Then came one of those days that happen to moms like me - moms whose kids never have matching socks and whose kids' toothbrushes end up being chewed by the dog or falling into the toilet. On that particular day, the dog jumped in the lake after a duck. The duck escaped, but my dog resembled the Creature from the Black Lagoon. One dog bath, one muddy mom and thirteen towels later, the dog was clean. But my two-year-old son had been suspiciously quiet during the whole ordeal. In fact, all the hairs on the back of my neck were standing on end. Even more than kitchen pot-banging, TV blaring and loud bickering, all moms dread "the silence." You know . . . that silence. "Alexa," I said, emerging from the bathroom, mud clinging to my hair, "where's your brother?" "I dunno." I went tearing through the house. Was he coloring on my bedroom walls again? No. I raced to the kitchen. Spilling cereal on the floor? No. He must be in his room. Was he climbing on top of his dresser pretending to be Superman again? Not there. "Nicholas!" I called out. Then, fearing my computer keyboard was being covered in apple juice, I ran to my office. There sat Nicholas. Surrounded by sixty-one opened boxes of Girl Scout cookies. In fact, he had the cellophane for the next pack in his teeth, attempting to bust open another box. Thin Mints, Peanut Butter Buddies and Shortbread Dreams, or whatever the heck they're called, were splayed from one end of the room to the other. Cookies were crushed beneath his chubby little feet, and crumbs covered his rosy cheeks. "Cookies!" he squealed. As I wrote out a check for over $250 dollars worth of Girl Scout cookies, I came to the realization that I am most definitely not a Brownie mom. But my son? He's the hero of Troop 408.

I SO Sexy...& The 3rd One...DAMN

Stella...We Had NO Choice BUT To Take Her 2 The SPCA

Enlightenment

I have come a long way yall.
My Gawd
Miracles do still happen.
In Girl Scouts,
They predicted that I would be the last one
To get married and have children.
Why did they say that?
Because of my wild streak and
Because my twins were all the birth control I needed.
Its funny though,
How life turns things around, isnt it?
Nan used to be the dork, nobody liked her,
Then BAM!!
She was so popular she barely had time for any of her old friends.
Ever since Mrs. & Mr. B had their bouts with cancer,
Nan has dramatically changed
again.
It seems like she is settling,
She’s no longer the outgoing rambunctious Nan
Who got on everybodys nerves.
Now, the former President of CC
Is engaged.
120 knocked off his pedestal
By a 19 year old EMT.
He was arguably the number one DarCo Ho Dog.
And I,
Shamefully,
Was his sidekick.
Look at us now…
He is on Nationally recognized Extrication teams,
Head over heals for a younger EMT,
And happy as Hell.
Me,
I have finally met my match.
Cheryl.
Like the song says,
* She knows how to hold me,
Without holding on *
I’m FINALLY on a fire department,
Actively headed back to school,
My wild streak . . .
Well . . .
It has been tamed down to me just fukkin with my hair.
I have come a long way.
No longer lost,
No longer the damsel in distress.
No longer carrying bleeding wounds,
Regrets,
Or resentments for those in my past.
I mean, ya know,
Its the past.
I was indeed a monstrous person.
But a caterpillars kinda funky and ugly lookin too.
The people in my past
Have helped me along on my road to self discovery and freedom.
I will not lie,
My DNA donor is still my akiles heel.
Time, love, and forgiveness
Will set me free of that imprisonment one of these days.
I cannot sit here and say
That if I saw Starlight or another whom I once loved out and about,
That it would not catch me off guard.
Now I have the capability
To smile,
Look to the Heavens to thanks the Gods and Goddesses
For watching out for me
And allowing me to find my way to my counterpart,
My soul mate,
My beloved,
My Bella.
During this past year, I have learned a shit load.
Number One:
She cannot read my mind.
I know how to write the words to express myself,
Speak them to tell her ( what's going on )!!
Communication is the key word here, folks.
Number Two:
Its the little things.
A note on the mirror.
Candle lit baths.
Making love.
Laughing.
Number Three:
It aint all hunky dory 24/7.
Yea, we may be what fairytales are BASED on.
But it is not as easy as it looks.
It takes work, communication,
Compromise, patience,
Understanding, and love to make this work.
Number Four: (On a personal note)
It does not mean a damn what others think of me,
Or my relationship with my Bella.
Their bigoted opinions do not dictate my self worth or self esteem.
The ONLY opinions that do matter
Are mine,
Cheryls,
And my familys. (And sometimes they can kiss my ass too, LoL!!)
Those who speak poorly of what she and I have,
Well . . .
Dont know the real me,
Are ignorant,
Judgmental,
Ill-bred morons with nothing better to do in their lives than talk about us.
I can only pray that they find peace within themselves.
I know I have found peace within myself.
It feels like a thousand pound load has been lifted off my shoulders.
I know I will be just fine.
I am a strong girl,
I have true close friends,
A supportive family,
And the most wonderful girl on my side
To be there with me when times get tough,
Or when I have a Sarah moment.
For the first time ever in my existence,
I have freedom in a relationship.
The reason behind that is
Non judging unwavering love.
I may still be finding my fashion sense,
My Yorkie,
My degree,
But alas I have found me...
And my one true love.

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you.

YUMMY

yesterday was so awesome!!
my Bella fixed Frogmore Stew
talk about DELICIOUS?!
gooooo---uuuuuuuud lord
thas some good eatin, yall.
LoL
and
my Bella murdered a Quail
not really
but i can dog her about it anyways.

Food For Thought- Where there's stankness, there's gas.

Fille Nouvelle Pour Mon Bella

ya know what?
i love my Bella.
we have the GRANDEST life EVER!!
we have a nice, cozy, country home...
surrounded by family land
and family too of course...
we go riding on our four wheeler at the whim of a fart,
through the woods and to the country store we go...
cut back to ride down Oasis Lane to smell all the water springs...
city girls can't smell them, Liz is proof.
today Bella burned off the area for her garden.
her uncle will till it up soon.
aww, come spring we'll be two lil lesbans out in the yard.
picture this:
" SHURL " tending to her garden,
ferocious Harley chasin the squirrels,
me layin out with my shades on
listenin to my fire department radio
sittin on go waitin on a call to tone out...
LIFE DON'T GET NO BETTER YALL!!
ain't that sweet?!
all the tears, gut wrenching heart ache,
anger, jealousy, stupid drama, dealing with FAKERS...
is all worth it...
for this,
this wonderful life my Bella & I have.
her garden will be beautiful,
as will i ( of course!! )
and to fit it perfectly,
it'll be springtime,
a time of rebirth.
our plans have been made,
the catalyst to turn our dreams into fruition has been sparked,
when all is said and done,
we will have our home,
our dogs ( Harley, Tink, & yet to be decided ),
my truck,
her car,
and she'll be the one stayin at home
so i can work and pamper her.
that's what any proper, real BUTCH does for her girl, right?
she takes care of her...
doesn't let anything crazy, dramatic, psychotic, or stupid
happen to the relationship, the home, or the love.
my Bella has pampered every whim i've had,
so yes i am spoiled.
upon graduation,
the shoe will be on the other foot.
i'll be one HOT MAMA,
boasting a badge, a radio, & a fire radio
with a KICK ASS truck,
a GIRLIFIED doggy,
my Yoda shit head,
the MOSTEST BEAUTIFUL girl in the world in my bed
* naughty thoughts *,
and everything our little hearts desire.
yup yup.
our life is great.
my Bella's unwaivering dedication
loyalty
appreciation
true beauty
bona fide southern morality
scrumptious curves
mesmerizing blue eyes
soft touch
gentle hands
strong love
are everything i need in this world.
i am so unbelievably lucky and Blessed
to be loved by such an amazing woman.
with every sweet surrendering kiss,
i thank the Gods and Goddesses that i'm a lesban.
when i was a little girl,
i sat down to make a list of my dream person,
the person i wanted to be with for the rest of my life.
and i shit yall not,
its straight out of PRACTICAL MAGIC.
my Bella possesses every item i listed,
plus more magnificent qualities
that only enhanced my awe for her.
" Well the whole town's talking,
'Bout the line I'm walking,
That leads right to your door,
Oh how I used to roam,
I was a rolling stone,
I used to have a wild side,
They say a country mile wide,
I'd burn those beer joints down,
That's all changed now,
You turned my life around,...
I saw the light,
I've been baptised,
By the fire in your touch,
And the flame in your eyes,...
I'm a brand new girl "

Nirvana

4 Wheelers, Golden Girls, American Idol

yesterday
doctor appointments all morning
in laws were in our house
momma in law cleaned before daddy in law came over
she had to de-gay the house
lol
then we got some Chinc food take out
went home and watched muh other woman in BUFFALO GIRLS
then me & my girl...
well just pay attention to the ...
no need in me divuldging all of our details
to the merciless public
2nd honeymoons are SO AWESOME!!
afterwards we went ridin on the four wheeler down our dirt road
and on our property...
that was cool as Hell.
then my Bella & i watched american idol.
we voted for the last guy who sang the elton john song
and the guy who sang bon jovi.
the night before we voted for paris,
the chick who sang midnight train to georgia.
Bella can't believe i have her watching american idol...
she can't even believe she is atually voting
she HATES reality shows!!
miracles still happen
all you need is...
a little faith, trust, and pixie dust...
hehe!!
i watched RETURN TO NEVERLAND on disney last night too
* WooT *
TiNK STiLL KiCKS ASS
yupyup
oh btw
found out another trip we'll be going on
is to FLORiDA in about a month or so
" Dorothy & Rose iN Collaboration: MiAMi iS NiCE, So i'LL Say iT TWiCE,
MiAMi iS NiCE, MiAMi iS NiCE, MiAMi iS...
Dorothy- Rose, That's wrong...iT Says 'MiAMi iS NiCE, So i'LL Say iT TWiCE!'
Rose- Ohh okay. Well what about THRiCE?
Dorothy- WHO THE HELL SAYS THRiCE THESE DAYS?! Thrice doesn't belong in a song, Rose. Just like interuteran. * Dorothy walks away distgusted *
Rose- MiAMi... You're cuter than... an interuteran... "
i watch the golden girls waaaaaaay too much.

Xanax & Fire Department Dykes

so i have all of my doctors' appointments scheduled...
oy!!
i even scheduled shit head's check up.
loads of fun, i tell you.
i called my psycholoist to ask him what to do with my sleeping problem.
he wants me to take 1 and a half to 2 more Xanax
30 minutes before i go to bed.
i am already taking 2 per day.
he can kiss my ass on that one.
i'm trying to take as few Xanax as i can per day.
eh thas okay.
i'mma ax my regular doc tomorrow.
last night i went to my fire department meeting.
very cool.
it appears i'm not the only dyke, lol.
but she's a baby dyke so i'll be nice.
i was watching the dog whisperer
and learned some interesting information from him.
it worked on harley.
* WooT *
very cool,
check out his WWW. ...
http://www.dogpsychologycenter.com/

food for thought: if you dunno why she's smiling, its prolly bc you have snot hanging out your nose, or she just cut an SBD that was seriously foul. advice,...just run either way!!

A Lil Weekend Update...

Friday wisabus came to spend the night.
When she got here,
We exchanged crimmus presents.
We are slack, we know.
She gave me a kick ass present:
Mr. & Mrs. Smith & Life Or Something Like It.
Cheryl & I gave her:
Peter Pan Special Edition, A Toilet Book for Brainiacs,
and soap with a pig on it.
We ate some Pasta Weesie,
Went to ride the four wheeler,
Then sat around a camp fire to talk some shit.
We all awoke the next morning to go to the dog show.
We got there in time to see the Yorkies . . .
And GOOOOOOOD LAWD!!
They was beeeee-youuuuu-teeee-ful!!
We went to grab lunch from Buger King before the dog show . . .
And while we were there,
I bought a Yoda Star Wars watch for $1.
Wis said I was like a child because I wanted to open the watch before I ate my food.
LoL!!
Hey, Im young at heart.
We were SUPPOSED to hear from Jack.
We never did.
( And Im so totally crushed too * sniffle sniffle * )
Wis was bored at the dog show . . .
So we drove two hours to stay for an hour and a half.
We bought Harley a squeaky toy he refuses to acknowledge;
The little faggot ass shithead.
Today Cheryl & I just hung out around the house,
For the most part.
I love spending one on one time like that with her.
We rode the four wheeler to a junk yard full of old ass, classic cars.
It was pretty cool.
Then this evening, my old homeboy called me.
It seems as if some 19 year old has put some humility into 120.
Time will tell, no doubt.
But for his sake,
I hope it is true this go around.
He too deserves happiness.
He may make it to the Extrication Finals out in LA,
Cross ya fingers.
It was good to hear from him.
Maybe we will get to see him in March when we go to Florence.
I have a busy week ahead of me;
I have Doctors to call, appointments to set, getting info from the right peeps
On what I need to do, places I gotta go . . .
Then tonight,
I lit some candles
And my Bella and I had a romantical time together . . .
I absolutely, one hundred percent, get tickled senseless when
She kisses me in the shower
While the water is pouring down on her head
And over our lips
As they touch in wondrous, sensuous ecstasy.
Makes me feel like our souls are intertwining
And we become stronger by the second.
I am truly Blessed to have MY Bella.
120 was super impressed when I told him
It will be one year next month for me & Cheryl.
Hot damn.
I think I might just indeed be growing up.
Not too much though…
I would not be Sarah if I grew up too much.

I gotta voice my opinion about some things:

The Dick Cheney incident-
-ACCIDENTS HAPPEN IN HUNTING!! The reason he delayed notifying the public is obvious. If you were VP, wouldnt you want some damn privacy in the time of a tradegy? You know the press would smell the blood ( pun INTENDED ), and hunt YOUR ass down like a rabid dog.
-I will use text from Rosies Blog to let yall see. I agree 100% with all was in her Blog about the incident. * Mary said: After hearing Cheneys account of his feelings after shooting a human - hmmmm - I say he goes right to the front lines in Iraq to share that with our young soldiers and maybe hear about their feelings too. Big difference between birdshot tho - eh?
-yes mary - yes - exactly what i thought when i saw dicks pain - is - he asks our children to kill daily - to kill other humans - to shoot them with guns - to take livesit is not easy to kill a human- odd 2 me also - that his first words were not im sorry

February 17th, 2006 - quail - Posted by ro @ 9:17 am in in the news
THE VICE PRESIDENT . . . But the image of him falling is something I will never be able to get out of my mind. I fired, and theres Harry falling. And it was, Id have to say, one of the worst days of my life, at that moment.
You cant blame anybody else. Im the guy who pulled the trigger and shot my friend. And I say that is something I will never forget.
Q Was anybody drinking in this party?
THE VICE PRESIDENT: No. You don’t hunt with people who drink.Thats not a good idea. We had –
Q So he wasnt, and you werent?
THE VICE PRESIDENT: Correct……………………………………I had a beer at lunch. *

Hmm, double edged sword, there. Accidents in hunting do happen. But it is quite the irony that it was the VP who shot somebody.

Food For Thought-- A poem

Anchored In You...
Sailing upon smooth waters,
I am anchored in you.
No turbulance,
water, clear glass.
Wind as it blows,
your fingers in my hair.
Sun on my face,
your touch.
Casting my sails in your direction,
I am coming home.
A star that wears your name,
is lending me direction,
the brightest in all the skies.
Waters that rock me gently,
lulling my sea soaked soul.
Your heart the harbor...
I will dock in...lover, I am anchored in you.
My sea fairing soul...
lowering my anchor...
inside the heart that is speaking to me.
My love...
I am anchored in you.

Hindsight

With each trip around the sun,
Hindsight gets closer to 20/20.
It is so easy to look back to see lessons learned.
But much like “The River” says,
We don’t know what’s in store,
Either way you have to choose to chance the rapids.
Things I dreamt of as a child,
Hell,
To be excruciatingly honest,
( Things I dreamt of ) Two years ago,
My dreams all seemed so far away,
inaccessible;
Like I was unworthy of being successfully happy.
But now…
Now it is within MY grasp.
I have the woman who anchored me down.
My Bella,
A paradox is she;
Soft and strong in every passing breath.
She is the woman in my dreams;
The girl I thought never existed.
With one kiss,
“the fire in your touch and the flame in your eyes,
Born to love again, I’mma brand new…” GiRL!!
I know without a doubt this is the woman I am meant to marry.
She is the one who clarifies the picture for me,
It all just makes sense with her.
I am closer to being where I want to be.
I have my girl, my dog ( 1 of em anyways ), a house in the country, a fire department…
Soon to follow are: a truck, school, my story’s completion, a wedding,
my PORKY yorkie ( LoL Bella ), and any dream I can dream there after!
But forget not my roots or where or what I came from.
Many a colorful skeletons reside in the closet of shame, fame, and Yuckies.
Two DNA donors know every freckle on my face,
But are blind to my aura, my soul, my personality, my good characteristics.
My Papa plants his gardens in the Heavens above.
He always said I was the Apple of his eye.
I wonder if my apple came into fruition, in his opinion.
My Nana,
She is watchin over all of the little tykes up there in the Heavens.
I can’t help but to wonder
If she is singing mine their lullabies.
My Mawmaw slowly rocks away her memory.
Will she remember my love for her?
My siblings who know me no longer fear me.
Big Bully Sarah has faded away to the Big Bestest Sister In The Whole World.
Old friendships formed long ago,
intertwined in the mystical magic of a humid Carolina Summer sky are now
Jaded and bittersweet moments immortalized in time.
An naive love gone awry;
Nearly a decade later, a culpable abhorrence burns my memory.
An innocence given to one who saves.
Hidden from the world, a mischievous admiration for a friend.
New found skin with the first kiss from a baby girl.
Those who lost their way seemed to make a mark on me.
Silent bleeding tears stained my cheeks with my departure.
The irony is:
A face that pretty ought not to be so sad.
Neither fool could save the other.
No tears, only purple rain.
Spiteful words leave a sour after taste on Karma’s palette.
Dumb asses and chasing empty dreams pacified
My need to feel important.
No doubt, friendships were tested.
Some salvaged, some left in the ruins.
What is meant to be shall be,
Destiny shall guide the way…
Kinda like that Northern Star on that broken road.
“ Twinkle, twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are, up above the sky so high,
Like a diamond in the sky, twinkle, twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are “

“I can't see the future
But I know it's coming fast
It's not that hard to wind up knee-deep in the past
There come alot of Mondays
Since that phone booth that first night
Tears and miles and years and smiles
I wanna get it right.

These days I get up about the time I used to go to bed
Living large was once the deal
Now I watch the stars instead
They're timeless and predictable
Unlike most things that I do
I tell the wind and my old friend
I'm headed home to you.

From the bottom of my heart
Off the coast of Carolina
After one or two false starts
I believe we found our stride
And the walls that won't come down
We can decorate or climb
Or find some way to get around
Cause I'm still on your side
From the bottom of my heart.”

The Rest of My Art...Ppfftt!!

Pan Painting

I re-did the background on my Pan Painting...I'll post the rest of my art work up later today.
* Dream a little dream, and wish upon a star...it TRULY makes no difference who you are *

I Finally Got It

golly yall.
i was SO excited ab Friday & Sat...
and what happened?!
i finally got what Cheryl had.
yup, i caught the GAS-tro-intestinal Influenza.
the difference between that and the regular flu is
congestion and coughing.
i had the shits REAL bad, nausia, vomiting, cold/hot sweats, fever, etc.
fun, fun.
i had an old aquatence's Mother for my nurse.
small world, i tell yall.
anyways, it was wierd bein back in Cola on Friday night...
passing by all the clubs.
good Lord i've come a long way.
i sat up in Goat Feathers at 5 points feelin sick as a cat in a room fulla rockin chairs.
Heather & Ann met us there.
i wish i coulda been well so i coulda enjoyed the party.
Cheryl & Mason said they wished i'd told them the truth
about how sick i felt, because they never woulda gone.
but my hard headed dumbass endured Nausia Hell so my Bella
could enjoy a rare night out with her friends.
i wanted so badly to see my boys this weekend.
damnit.
anyways, i'mma head off.
peace, luv, 'n chicken butt.

food for thought- when a person with the flu says " oh SHIT "...GET OUT THE WAY

Died Muh Hair, Laa Dee Dah

well not much to say today,...
can you believe it?!
i rectified the Momma- In- Law situation.
as a matter of fact,
she died my hair this morning.
yup i did it...
AUBURN hair with two blonde streaks.
its a lil funky,
SO NOT Candice,...
it'll take some gettin used to, but its cool.
my Mom will DESPISE it, LoL.
Mason's comin today after the BDay party,
then off to Columbia tonight for a night on the town,
tomorrow....
* WooT *
i can't wait!!
i'm da luckiest gurl in da whole wide world!!
watched the Grammys...
i'm suprised to say i've found two performers who's music i discovered i liked;
paul mccartney and john legend.
very interesting.
anyways,
peace out yall.

food for thought- never fart into a fan.

Mrs. King, Some Bitching, And More Ranting...

ET showed Oprah standing over
Coretta Scott Kng's body in her open casket.
O was putting on a helluva show,
she attempted to look lovingly & solemnly at Mrs. King
while she traced her index finger over Mrs. King's chin.
The fakeness made me sick to my stomach.
Yea so Oprah has enough money to run her own civilization,
but Oprah was NOT the correct person to have given Mrs. King's eulogy.
It did NOT serve the late Mrs. King adequate & deserved justice.
It was a sickening disgrace.
One would not have seen the likes of...say for example, Kelly Clarkson,
giving Pincess Diana's eulogy.
Outrage, people.
The more I think about it, the more anti-American I become.
I'm in a country that doesn't recognize my God given free will to love and bed a woman,
a country that has offed too many of the actual GOOD damn leaders (JFK, RFK, MLK Jr.),
a country to where the good people won't sell thier soul to be in Office where changes could be made,
a country that is having a senseless war,
the more I think, the more I see...
Heil Bush, everybody.
You dumb fucking morons who voted for the lunatic
enabled a tyrant to magically turn USA's democracy into a tyranny that has no soul.
Changing the subject, DRAMATICALLY,...
How well do you know your lover, or your best friend?
Would you ever try to hurt them by insulting thier intregity,
as a human being,
as a friend?
No? That's what I thought too.
But I suppose shit hit the fan,
so it just kinda stinks right now, ya know?
I'm trying to figure out something...
How to NOT let others have the power of influence over your own emotions & self worth.
Anybody know the answer to that one?
Yea, no...I didn't think so.
I finished my painting of the twins tonight.
Now I must decide whether or not to show the family.
Mason is coming for a visit this week...that'll be awesome.
Hoping to resolve the Mother-In-Law thing before he arrives.
Okay so I am dyin my hair yall.
Yup, its back on.
Gettin a nice red color with blonde streaks. (But no worries, I aint turnin all Candice!!)
Pondering getting the Tink hair cut so I can spike it, bc that'd be SO cute!!
(Plus I'd be getting my Tink tatt on my B-Day to match).
Kick ass.
I'm gonna pull myself up outta this funk
& then " THE BITCH WILL BE BACK "!!
anyways, i did this birthday & name calculator
and these were my results.
i'd say it is mostly accurate.
food for thought- find a twinkle of happiness in this ugly world, it'll brighten your world with every happy little tawt!! :-)
http://www.paulsadowski.com/birthday.asp (where i did the bday & name calculator thingy)
You entered: 4/27/1982
Your date of conception was on or about 4 August 1981 which was a Tuesday. (EW, THAT IS KINDA CREEPY & DISGUSTING TO KNOW THAT!!)
You were born on a Tuesday under the astrological sign Taurus. Your Life path number is 6. The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2445086.5. The golden number for 1982 is 7. The epact number for 1982 is 5. The year 1982 was not a leap year. Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 1/25/1982 and ending 2/12/1983. You were born in the Chinese year of the Dog. The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 11 April 1982. The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 24 February 1982. The date of Whitsun (Pentecost Sunday) in the year of your birth was Sunday 30 May 1982. The date of Whisuntide in the year of your birth was Sunday 6 June 1982. The date of Rosh Hashanah in the year of your birth was Saturday, 18 September 1982. The date of Passover in the year of your birth was Thursday, 8 April 1982. The date of Mardi Gras on your birth year was Tuesday 23 February 1982. As of 2/8/2006 3:21:01 AM EST You are 23 years old. You are 286 months old. You are 1,241 weeks old. You are 8,688 days old. You are 208,515 hours old. You are 12,510,921 minutes old. You are 750,655,261 seconds old. Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 3.40039138943249 years old. (Life's just a big chewy bone for you!)
There are 78 days till your next birthdayon which your cake will have 24 candles. Those 24 candles produce 24 BTUs,or 6,048 calories of heat (that's only 6.0480 food Calories!) . You can boil 2.74 US ounces of water with that many candles.
In 1982 there were approximately 3.6 million births in the US. In 1982 the US population was approximately 226,545,805 people, 64.0 persons per square mile. In 1982 in the US there were 2,495,000 marriages (10.8%) and 1,180,000 divorces (5.1%) In 1982 in the US there were approximately 1,990,000 deaths (8.8 per 1000) In the US a new person is born approximately every 8 seconds. In the US one person dies approximately every 12 seconds. Your birthstone is Diamond.. The Mystical properties of Diamond- Diamonds are said to increase personal clarity to help one see things clearly as well as be straight-forward and honest. Supposedly, the higher quality the diamond, the better it is supports these qualities. Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources) Opal, Quartz, White Sapphire.
Your birth tree is- Walnut Tree, the Passion -
Unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egoistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromises.
There are 320 days till Christmas 2006! There are 333 days till Orthodox Christmas! The moon's phase on the day you wereborn was waxing crescent.
---------------------------
You entered: Sarah F-----s Anderson
There are 20 letters in your name. Those 20 letters total to 86. There are 7 vowels and 13 consonants in your name.
Your number is: 5
The characteristics of #5 are: Expansiveness, visionary, adventure, the constructive use of freedom.
The expression or destiny for #5: The number 5 Expression endows with the wonderful characteristic of multi-talents and versatility. You can do so many things well. The tone of the number 5 is constructive freedom, and in your drive to attain this freedom, you will likely be the master of adaptability and change. You are good at presenting ideas and knowing how to approach people to get what you want. Naturally, this gives you an edge in any sort of selling game and spells easy success when it comes to working with people in most jobs. Your popularity may lead you toward some form of entertainment or amusement. Whatever you do, you are clever, analytical, and a very quick thinker.
If there is too much of the 5 energy in your makeup, you may express some the negative attitudes of the number. Your restless and impatient attitude may keep you from staying with any project for too long. Sometimes you can be rather erratic and scatter yourself and your energies. You have a hard time keeping regular office hours and maintaining any sort of a routine. You tend to react strongly if you sense that your freedom of speech or action is being impaired or restricted in any way. As clever as you are, you may have a tendency to make the same mistakes over and over again because much of your response is glib reaction rather that thoughtful application. You are in a continuous state of flux brought by constantly changing interests.
Your Soul Urge number is: 2
A Soul Urge number of 2 means: With the Soul Urge number 2, your motivation is centered on friendships, partnerships, and companionship. You want to work with others as a part of a cooperative team. Leadership is not important to you, but making a contribution to the team effort is. You are willing to work hard to achieve a harmonious environment with sensitive, genial people.
In a positive sense, the 2 Soul Urge is sympathetic, extremely concerned and devoted. The nature tends to be very sensitive to others, always tactful and diplomatic. This element in your nature indicates that you are rather emotional. You are persuasive, but in a very quiet way, never forceful. You are the type that makes really close friendships because you are so affectionate and loving.
If this number is over-emphasized in your makeup, you may be over-sensitive, with a delicate ego that is too easily hurt. You may be timid or fearful, too easygoing for your own good.
Your Inner Dream number is: 3
An Inner Dream number of 3 means: You dream of artistic expression; writing, painting, music. You would seek to more freely express your inner feeling and obtain more enjoyment from life. You also dream of being more popular, likable, and appreciated.

I Believe

its been a while since my last post
i must admit
i cheated
i tried out xanga.com's bloggerworld
didn't like it as much as i do this bloggers' world.
american idol rages on
debasing myriad unheard-of faces
shame has mislaid its price tag.
All for what?
15 minutes?
A snapshot of the facade of your reflection
cynical and faded,
Black and white pitiable story to pass to your grandkids.
Vanity,
Pride.
Wow,
Look where it has gotten us.
I stopped today to again ponder the Almighty;
Garth Brooks.
what a man.
What a mighty, mighty fine man. And I’ll say it again…
Oops, sorry. ADD’s kickin in, plus that wasn’t exactly too Lesbianic, was it?
CAN YA FEEL IT?! IT’S A * SOPHIA QUOTE *, e’erybody!!
” but I digress,… “
Bluest eyes that will seduce you to His powers
Graced with a voice only the angels would slumber to.
9 million sold on the Wal-Mart Limited Edition Box Set…
Zeus must be growing blasé and aloof of his lightening bolts up on Mt. Olpympus.
A premonition anticipates a reappearance from retirement
When his youngest offspring debuts at college.
Duets are a bolt from the blue for the Country Industry, me thinks.
Imagine:
Reba and Garth,
Jimmy Buffet and Garth,
Gretchen Wilson and Garth…
A PR Rep’s lifetime and largest achievement one can possibly concoct.
It would be the dream of dreams,
It couldn’t….
WOULDN’T…
Get any bigger than His return.
This mere mortal seduced a corporation for the sake of a dream.
Maybe there is indeed good left in this world?
Undoubtedly,Garth would have a higher approval rating as President of the United States right now, VS. our own POTS.
“2,241 dead,
16,549 wounded
2,241 devastated families
unseen
hidden from our eyes
our hearts”
Says Rosie.
The tides still blanket the shores of the Carolina Marshes,…
My paintings continue,
Matching rings we now have…
I tell her that it is my mark,…
Kind of like when the dog pisses on a tree.
One month away from the one year mark,
One year closer to the real me.
Facing raw and true emotions to lay them to rest
Is hard even to soldiers of combat in this war of life.
Karma…
It has its way of taking care of everything, doesn’t it?
Okay, that’s enough of my ramblings.
I’m off to my EBay wars and art work.

“Rain on the roof and time on my hands
It sure seemed quit out there in radio land
They call me at the all-night station
Make their special dedications
And I do my best to play their request
When it's a desperate situation
This was a desperate situation

[Chorus:]
I'm Mr. Midnight alone and blue
The brokenhearted call me up
When they don't know what else to do
Every song is a reminder of the love that they once knew
I'm Mr. Midnight can I play a song for you”





I love you Bella.
Thank you, for everything.
Here’s to us, sweetheart.


Just Might (Make Me Believe) Lyrics - Sugarland

I got miles of trouble spreadin' far and wide
Bill on the table gettin' higher and higher
They just keep on comin', theres no end in sight
I'm just holding on tight...
I've got someone who loves me more then words can say
And I'm thankful for that each and every day
And if I count all my blessings, I get a smile on my face
Still hard to find faith..

[Chorus:]
But if you look in my eyes
And tell me we'll be alright
If you promise never to leave
You just might make me believe
Its just day to day tryin' to make ends meet
What I'd give for an address on easy street
I need a deep margarita to help me unwind
Leave my troubles behind...

I used to believe in use
When times got tough
Lately I'm afraid that even love is not enough

But if you can look in my eyes
And tell me we'll be alright
If you promise never to leave you just might make
Oh, you just might make me
You just might make me believe